Monday, October 6, 2008

Time to Heal

"Rape is an interpersonal trauma that requires interpersonal healing. The more opportunities to safely confront the impact of rape with understanding and support, the greater the recovery."
-via eCounseling.com

I'm not going to get too deep into what I'm going through right now, because after 12 years of trying to not accept this part of me, I finally am willing to do so... and it is very painful. I am a rape survivor. And I am finally willing to face it & heal. The only reason I'm even mentioning this part of my life on this blog is because if someone else in eSpace needs to know they are not alone, then I am here to say... you're not alone.

I was raped by someone who I thought was a friend.
I was raped by someone of my own sex.
I was raped and didn't face it for 12 years.
And now I will heal.

Lesbian rape or same sex sexual assault is real and does happen. And it's hard to find support resources for LGBTQ folks who are dealing with this. I'm quite sure many aspects are the same for all people who have gone through such trauma, but I also feel that as a queer woman, knowing whom ever I discuss my feelings & experiences, will "get it" is very important. Especially because what same sex rape looks like may be different than heterosexual assault.

There may not be a lot of discussion among sexual minorities about same sex sexual assault because perhaps knowing "our own" could do such a thing is difficult to face. Or perhaps we don't want to talk about to among ourselves & in public because of the fear of some kind to confirmation of deviance to homophobic & trans phobic people. Or maybe we don't "go there" because like any rape, it's hard to. Whatever the reason, today I'm speaking up, so we can heal each other, ourselves & the world's violence.

Here are some resources. As I go through this journey I may share on this topic again in blog form or I may not. Either way, I'd appreciate any prayers & good thoughts in the direction of all survivors who need to heal. Thanks!

Rape, Abuse & Incest National Network http://www.rainn.org/
An Abuse, Rape and Domestic Violence Aid and Resource Collection http://www.aardvarc.org/

In Oregon

Portland Women's Crisis Line http://www.pwcl.org/
http://www.survivorproject.org/ for trans & intersex survivors

Cities like New York, San Francisco & Seattle have non-profits aimed at sexual assault survivors too.

Peace to us all!
~F

3 comments:

Mrs. E said...

oh franola... i am sorry for your pain and will send out a prayer for you and all other survivors out there.
thank you for sharing, i think you are right about there not being much talk about it in the GLBTQ community.
Again your strength, honesty and willingness to share is amazing to me. Your voice makes a difference in this world! Don't ever think different.
I love you!

breathingmoss said...

Thank you for posting and for sharing these vital resources.

Silence can be such an insidious form of violence, and your words help with the healing.

Blessings,
m

Grumpy Granny said...

I commented on this post at TLL, but one of my college classmates, who now manages a theater in North Carolina, wrote this recent column and I thought you might appreciate it:

http://www.chapelhillnews.com/opinion/story/18559.html

Many blessings,

GG