So this morning I'm getting ready for school and I decide to look at my dog Lucy's butt hole. Sometimes she gets dirty butt hole and since she's very much a lap dog, I didn't want crusty poop butt on my pants or couch. With very little time before I need to catch a bus for class, I take Lucy into the bathroom for a little dog-butt maintenance.
Not only did she need her butt wiped but she had a relatively large poo chuck on the side of her anus that needed to be dealt with ASAP. I turned her belly side up on my lap and took a fresh tea tree wipe to her ass. My hand was really wiping away at that chunk which was quickly becoming a smear and I thought to myself in a self-congratulatory manner "wow she's not squirming at all like usual. She must really understand that I'm the alpha here and that's why she's behaving." No sooner after I finished this thought, did she promptly barf all over my skinny jeans.
You know it's going to be a good day when your first event of the morning is getting thrown up on while cleaning a dog butt hole.